fairytales are my written dreams. <3

Thursday, September 04, 2008

at this stage in time, we both know this is not the kind of ending we want.but really,all the constant arguments, quarrels, and everything..it just keeps on building up and you told me that every night you cry yourself to sleep.i really cant bear for that to happen. you can tell me that after a sleep, every thing's over and its a brand new beginning.but, you know and i know, the situation's over but the issue's always there. it had always been. maybe I've changed. last time, i gave in to you all the time but now, honestly, i find that i do not have the strength the patience to do it anymore. All along, i have been drop dead honest with you, i told you, if you find a better guy, just go ahead. go with him.and i explained to you. its not that i don't love you enough or I'm pushing you away.it is because i know that i am not good enough. from the beginning till now, i knew it all along.it's my first,and lets just say i do not know about doing it well enough.on the other hand, i know what you are looking for, the sweetness, the tenderness, and the TLC that you always told me about. and the sad thing is that all along, i know i am not that kind of person;I'm not the person that you are looking for on the other end of the road.you know, pacifying sweet talk,sing songs for your birthdays, everything, i cant.but i tried to give you alternatives, no holding of guitars and singing your favourite song, but at least a surprise trip and plan which i hope you really like.maybe the way i do things, you don't like it. because you told me that you don't feel me there being with you when things crops up. your grandma's passing, the irritating b*tch who keeps irritating us, the Roy's friend's incident. I mean its OK, we'll not talk about it now, take it as my fault OK.i failed as a boyfriend, i didn't make your mark. I'm sorry. Of course, there are many many other things that are not being said here, good or bad, but rest assure, i won't forget all the nice things we went through together as one.

13:39